Emily, Sunday 12.12.10

This morning, whilst actually rearranging furniture (I've decided that I might as well have my stuff in my mother's old room now that it's free, it is the largest room), I came across something that I've never seen before. Under my mother's bed, deeper than the silver box full of love letters from William's dad, I found a briefcase. It's one of those ones with a numbered lock. I tired my mother's birthday, and William's, and his father's, but I couldn't get it open. I wonder what's inside of it.


Anyway, the briefcase put me in a foul mood. I wonder how many other secrets my mother had been keeping from me? I wonder if she ever told William about the contents of the briefcase? And she didn't tell any of us about the creature until it was too late.


I was so mad about the briefcase that I accidentally punched a hole in the wall between my old bedroom and hers. It's okay though, I've covered it over with my "It's A Wonderful Life" poster.
Later, I found my old camera in the back of my mother's closet. I remember that she took it away from me when I was fifteen as a punishment for staying out all night at Roger Crawlies' birthday party. I used to love taking pictures, mostly of silly things really - the insects in the garden and the dirt under my fingernails. I might take it up again, to take my mind off of things.


And then, this afternoon, I just stayed in and watched Christmas films. I can't believe that it's the 12th already. Seems like only yesterday William and I were all dressed up and waiting for the limo to drive us to our mother's funeral. It'll be exactly a year since her death in one month's time. How time flies when you're having fun!


I'll talk to you tomorrow.